Fire Insurance or Discipleship?

Has my goal been to just have “fire insurance” (protection from going to Hell) or to be a disciple of Jesus Christ? After 38 years of being a Christian I think I am finally to the point of yearning to be a disciple.

I wonder why, after 38 years of warming a pew most Sunday mornings, it has taken me this long to get to this point. Am I that slow a learner? Is the concept of discipleship seldom preached? Perhaps the answer is a combination of both.

God clearly tells us that He wants to be first in our lives, He demands to be in first place. If He isn’t I think we fall in the category of the church in Laodicea (Rev 3:14-16) or those who mistakenly believe themselves to be saved (Mt 7:21-23).

If we (If I) actually am a believer why did it take me so long to want to be a disciple? Why have I chosen to hold on to so much control over my life for so long? Why have I rejected God’s promise of an “abundant life” (Jn 10:10)? The level of abundant life I will have on this earth is directly proportional to the level of control I cede to God. He is not going to bless me abundantly if I chose to limit my commitment to warming a pew on Sunday morning, nor should I expect Him to do so.

The old hymn His Eye is on the Sparrow comes to mind.

Why should I feel discouraged, why should the shadows come, why should my heart feel lonely and long for the heaven and home; when Jesus is my portion, a constant friend is He, His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches over me.

I sing because I’m happy, I sing because I’m free, for His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Let not your heart be troubled, His tender word I hear, and resting on His goodness, I lose my doubt and fears; though by the path He leadeth, but one step I may see, His eye is on the sparrow He watches me.

I sing because I’m happy, I sing because I’m free, for His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Whenever I am tempted, whenever clouds arise, when songs give place to sighing, when hope within me dies, I draw the closer to Him, from care He sets me free; His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

I sing because I’m happy, I sing because I’m free, for His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Luke 12:6&7 – Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows. Matthew 3:29-31 similar.